Wherever he went

Vlad Marica

They met at a café and sat at an angle to each other. They exchanged a couple of pleasantries and sipped on their espressos. You could feel the tension building up in the air, his eyes pierced with intensity as he was preparing to let out the essence of his existence, the love he felt he let out in pulses, carefully-timed and released, shattering everything in sight with tenderness and compassion. It left a mark on everyone and everything it touched. It was impossible to accept anything else after you felt it, it came into your world and permuted your entire life, it made you feel happiness as richness, inner peace as success, your body’s energy and vibration as tremendous wealth. It made you take in everything you felt and go crazy with the intensity of living.

That was the meaning of his life, to spread his all-encompassing love wherever he went, to whoever he met, just to feel alive.

My two cents

VladOne Comment

I haven’t written in a while. I guess it’s time, here are some ideas, the list will grow and grow.

  • Give it a shot anyway. Even if you think you can’t get the girl or aren’t good enough for the job. It’s your duty.
  • There are situations and circumstances in life where there’s nothing there for you. Don’t be afraid to go out of them.
  • Daily life has a way of giving you little time to see the people you love most. It happens. Just enjoy the time you have around them.
  • It’s not about the love you get, it’s about the love you give.
  • Seriously, RTFM.
  • Most good things begin with a list.
  • Eat garlic.

Ș-acum

Vlad

S-au întâmplat multe de când nu v-am mai scris. Am petrecut o iarnă într-un loc care nu mi-a plăcut mult. Răsplata a fost că mi-am găsit mai apoi un cămin al meu, primul, într-un loc pe care îl iubesc. Am mai călătorit un pic prin lume, am zburat cu câteva sute de kilometri pe oră deasupra autostrăzii și am mai câștigat aportul firesc de fire albe sau lipsă. Am jonglat, jonglez și voi jongla cu energii. Încărcare / descărcare / încărcare și mai tare. Concatenare tare. Și apoi descărcare.

Atribuțiile și responsabilitățile cresc. Și mă simt din ce în ce mai liber, pentru că pot spune „nu” din ce în ce mai răspicat, și fac lucrurile așa cum vreau eu. Viața nu e de glumă, și tocmai d-asta râd. Viața nu e greu întotdeauna, dar este atunci când doare mai tare. Are sens, nu?

Vă pup. Ne vedem curând, p-aproape.

A prețui

Vlad

M-ați întrebat aseară ce-am învățat eu din relația cu ea. Am învățat multe, am continuat să învăț niște lucruri cunoscute din trecut…

Am învățat să fiu și mai sincer. Să-i spun partenerei mele gândurile pozitive, dar mai ales pe cele negative. Că nu mă simt bine sau că nu am poftă de ceva. Sau că nu vreau, nu pot să mă văd cu ea.

Este eliberator. Fiecare dintre noi trăiește într-o cușcă, și mulți dintre noi nu ne dăm seama de asta. Eu tocmai descopăr cușca asta, puțin cu puțin. Și de fiecare dată când mai descopăr vreo gratie mă văd cum o dobor, cu o determinare mai adâncă decât am simțit vreodată. Determinarea îmi vine din suflet.

Și odată cu deschiderea față de celălalt descopăr și încrederea în el. Și ceea ce înseamnă să prețuiești un om, cu bunele și cu relele sale, și să-l respecți și să-i fii și să-i rămâi alături, chiar dacă între voi nu e bine. Asta e dragoste.

Schlendern

Vlad

Bin lange durch die Stadt geschlendert, um mich zu verabschieden. Ein Teil von mir bleibt da, den gleichen nehme ich mit. Ist mathematischer Unfug, meine Gefühle können aber keine Mathe.

Action

Vlad

My experiences here are absolutely necessary for my personal liberation. I show my face in front of all, I show what is true and real to me. I see relationships form, I see bonds grow and I see trust and respect condensing lucidly out of thin air. I cannot live without love, affection and truth, they are pillars of my resilience and my verticality toward myself.

I see myself acting clearly, instinctively, because only through action can I exist. There is no happiness without action (Disraeli) – action is the only way to shed my hardship and return to my purest form, break my bonds and come out into the world, relentlessly. Pure energy. When I act I am.

Träume

Vlad

Mein ganzes Leben, die Zeit wo ich meine Träume verwirklichen kann, und gleichzeitig keine Ziele haben möchte. Träume haben mit Zielen gar nichts zu tun, verdammt. Träume sind reine Selbstverwirklichung.

Breathe in

Vlad

I drove through the countryside today, I flew toward the hills with resolve, I saw the low clouds streak across my path, stretching their haze and engulfing my horizon, I breathed in their vapor and I let myself become part of it.

I became the freedom of motion, I became the air hurtling around my body and I again understood what potent medicine the discovery of new places is.

I understood how moving through the world is moving through my heart. Undiscovered plains, mountains, everything is infinite and everywhere I keep finding myself, again and again. I am everywhere.

Falling in love?

Vlad

Bull-shit. Falling in love has nothing to do with the other. Falling in love is the crazy, delirious, liberating feeling I get when I throw my heart on a platter in front of the entire world. Falling in love has only to do with me.

Because falling in love is falling in love with myself. It’s the celebration of freeing myself from my bounds and throwing myself head-first into the cold ocean which we call life. Zero fears, zero inhibitions.

Falling in love is transcending this world and being everywhere, falling in love is denying and suspending time. Falling in love is ripping apart the fabric of this unholy human construct.

Falling in love is being in a place devoid of everything but what is already within me. Love. Life. Beauty.

To err

Vlad

I live and I err, the chagrin opens my heart and deep emotions ensue. I am amazed at the magic of it all: I am sad and I am here with – and for my-self. My sadness is absolutely legitimate. My sadness is only a means to learn to know another part of my heart, definite and fine. And each part is as warm and loving and soothing and healing as my own palms caressing my face.

It is impossible to love another without loving oneself.